He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
Randomize