Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
My mom asked what the mark on my neck was - I told her I burned it with a straightener.
She believed that the monsterous hickey on your neck was a burn?
well, not really. but then i reminded her that my sister has yet to take that pregnancy test and she conviniently forgot about my hickey
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
I'm concerned I may die tonight. All I've been told about my bday shenanigans is to bring slutty clothes, a bikini, tylenol, sunglasses and pjs. Tell me what the fuck is going on...now
bring lube too
i hate all of you
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
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