I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
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