I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
Randomize