I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
just got out of a noise viloation because the cop recognized my roomate as his favorite chipotle burrito roller. just another reason I love ritos
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
Randomize
