Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Randomize
