I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
How has he not realized you're pregnant?
Spanx.
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
Randomize
