drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
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