Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
Attn every girl I've slept with in the past 26 years of my life. One of you cunts gave me herpes. This is the 4th of 5 group MMS. That's right. It's in the 50s. There are two girls I don't have #s for. One was on a cruise and the other was a prostitute in Amsterdam. So which of you has herpes?
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Randomize
