Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
Randomize