he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
Randomize
