She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
I gambled and lost. Had to pull into a funeral home to clean up with a copy of my resume.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
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