5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
Randomize
