You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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