Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
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