Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
I want to walk on stilts...naked
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
Randomize
