What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
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