There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
Randomize
