chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
Google Maps needs to have a hungover setting. That bitch talks too loud and all I want is breakfast tacos & a bloody fucking mary.
Ps. I'm slapping the bag. It's an emergency.
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
Randomize
