I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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