Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
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