Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
Maid of honor screwed up the joke so I just got to explain what a strap on is and why a married lady might want one to Grandma and my brother's wedding shower.
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
Randomize
