please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
Randomize
