Christians are straight up FREAKS
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
At least drunk me was smart enough to stash toilet paper in my bag before I started my walk home. Finally countless squat pees and wiping with grass taught me to be prepared.
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
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