I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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