Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
Randomize
