why didn't you poke me back
he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
Randomize
