operation harelip BJ is a go
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
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