Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
Randomize
