i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
What's grosser: using a dirty sex towel as an oven mitt? or using the oven to reheat superbowl bean dip for dinner?
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
Next Halloween, remind me to find a different wingman. Walking out in your pirate costume talking like Captain Ahab while i was banging her and telling me I had to harpoon the white whale really pissed her off.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
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