how can u be prego again
Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
Randomize
