Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
