I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
she peed on how many people?
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
Almost screamed "GO FISH MOTHER FUCKER" at the girl I nanny today. Drunken card games shouldn't bleed into my sober life.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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