I love black thongs
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
Four minutes until I can fart!
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
Turns out the creepy dude who bought us tequila shots was the friend of a friend who then got us a table and several large bottles of champagne.
Never judge a man by his mustache.
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
Randomize
