You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
