I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.
she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.
are you serious?
I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
Randomize
