see... this is why i put birth control in all my friends drinks
wait.... you do what?
Im at a strip club, and the dancer just farted into my face. The bad part about that is I could taste the wings I bought her earlier
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
Randomize
