Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
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