dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
Randomize
