And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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