I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
Come home. Im drunk and cutting my own hair. This is bad, i need you.
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
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