biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
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