Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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