Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
handjob tips. give me some.
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
where are my pants?
in the oven.
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
Randomize
