I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
It's just like the Real World with babies
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
Randomize
