Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
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