You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
He woke up wondering who broke in and rearranged all the furniture. He reviewed 11 hours of security footage before I told him he did it while whiskey-drunk.
Randomize
