just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize