This phone does not accept mass texts. Try again.
im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
Randomize