Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
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